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Bituwin - image

Jeremiah 29:11. Jeremiah 29:11. For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster,to give you a future and a hope.

Lacking of Confidence?

hmm, for this past one week. I am like a huge fat rat swimming in a huge pool of infested sharks. I am trying so hard to avoid them, of coz for the start, i do get bitten. Somehow, my image did portray an image of lack of confidence, which i do admit lah. Even my mentor did tell me off that i dont have the confidence to peform those daily tasks that she is entrusted to.

I always feel that things should go smoothly without any glitches. Haha. But things arent always that plain sailing. Isnt so? Hmm... To make the matter worse, i am a perfectionist and gets very upset easily over the mistake that i have made. I will get freaking demoralised and tends to thinks of myself very lowly and think that i am stupid to commit such a damn mistake. I tend to give up after just trying for a while.

Take for my weight loss issue, i took a long time to adjust and adapt. Success doesnt come overnight, but i always think if i have the determination, i should be able to do it. But there are many unexpected factors and issues to consider. I became depressed and with the encouragement of my friends, i came out of the blues and slowly i do taste the success of my wt loss fruit.

Now that this job throws me off the safety comfort zone. I see those staff so capable and competent. Deep inside, i have already lost the battle. Isnt that so? If my mind is already defeated, no matter i try to chin up, i have already conceded defeat, which my inner self will signal that mistakes will bound to come up. Plus, i have to work for freaking twelve hours which stretches thin my body endurance. I wanted to quit liao. haha. But after having lunch with my ex colleagues that are much older than me, they tell me that this is normal. After all, this is just adjustment period, mistake are bound to have. Just that i have to be more patient. I sighed.Hai.

8/25/2007 08:07:00 pm ·